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Running on Jewish Time

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Time Unaware

Does time ever mold into that endless form, where uninterrupted before you is the path of your days, of labor and sleep without end?

The days are long and the years short.

And you don't know where you are going?

the life eternally caught in the last golden hours before nightfall, wondering where the day has gone.

But....

if you find your goal, your rhythm, your aim.

there are never enough hours in the day.
the year wraps around in the pattern of the seasons each part of the plan.
the time is counted and reused and ties together, rather than being a dozen parallel lives.

Living not just existing

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Penciling Things In

So it's the ten days between Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur.

And I'm currently swimming a sea of work that has no apparent end. So when am I finally going to get to dry land and be able to sit down and have that talk with G-d that I've been meaning to have for at least five monthes?

Not soon. So what shall we do besides this interimiable doggy paddle?

float and drift awhile and talk to G-d right then and there. Yes, the tide is against you and no it will not get any easier.

But what's the point?

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

He who finishes at all

If a person does teshuva, today the last day of the year, it's as if he did teshuva the entire year. [gemara somewhere, but i trust rav leff]

How? because tonight we're going to be judged on the basis of where we are right now. wherever that might be. so nine hours and counting how many mitzvot do you think you can do?

or what quality of mitzvot can you do?

... After the Fact

There are those among who do not have the luxury and truly the necessity of spending today calculating the gains and losses of the past year. We are at work putting in the extra hours to make up. Finishing school projects early so we can take the chag off, washing floors to get ready for the troops of guests.

We are all struggling, spending our time on other things so that tonight, as we light the candles, walk to Shul, listen to the chazan's hushed voice begin the low tunes that are sung only this day and one other, we may stand there, not as lawyers and accountants, engineering majors and graduate students, but as our most basic Jewish selves.

Today we are not spending learning the nuances of the prayers and laws, but we wish we were. We are not spending the day in earnest contemplation of G-d but working in all our various way to prepare for it. Directly or indirectly.

G-d when He weighs us tonight might find us wanting in accomplishment, but will He find us wanting in effort?

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Pure

Elul symbol is a virgin because we can only accept G-d's soveriegnity if we're pure.

At best that's a wince, at worst we outright laugh at the idea of being pure. Of not having all the rips and tears and tears staining yourself. What's pure still?

On Anger and Supression

I hate seeing people trampled, it makes me very angry at whomever is the trampler. The problem comes where the trampler and tramplee are one and the same. Then I get angry at them for both vicious agression and despondent indifference.

Being bound instead of working

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Self Googling

Ever type your name into google.

felt the ever so faint disappointment of only 4 or 5 hits or maybe none at all.

you can't find your identity on the net. You can't find your identity from anyone or anything else. Not even from causes. So what is our basic self?
our will. Our desire to desire that which is best in us. So what do I desire to desire?

what is it I will will to be?

I have to choose. No one else will choose for me.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Newspeak

like collateral damage.

if you're really sure that was the right thing to do. articulate it.

so what about the idea of pure language.

i think staying away from a lie takes paramount over a nice idea.

so let's be brutally honest. factual honest. not polemical honest

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

L'Zichon Shem

For the sake of all those killed yesterday:
1) Maria Sokolov, 58
2) Tatiana Koritchenko, 49
3) Rosita Lehman, 43
4) Emanuel Yosef, 28,
5) Tekala Tiroyainet, 33
6) Tamara Dibrashvilli, 70, from Or Yehuda
7) Denise Hadad, 40
8) Avial Atash, 4
9) Karin Malcha, 23
10) Shoshana Amos, 64
11) Vitaly Brodsky, 52
12) Nargiza Oststovsky, 54 (wife of Vitaly)
13) Larisa Gomanenko, 48
14) Roman Sokolovsky, 51
15) Eliyahu Ozen, 58

L'zichron Shem

For the sake of those who were murdered for living in Israel yesterday in Be'er Sheva by two bus bombs, pray for shalom this elul

1) Maria Sokolov, 58
2) Tatiana Koritchenko, 49
3) Rosita Lehman, 43
4) Emanuel Yosef, 28,
5) Tekala Tiroyainet, 33
6) Tamara Dibrashvilli, 70, from Or Yehuda
7) Denise Hadad, 40
8) Avial Atash, 4
9) Karin Malcha, 23
10) Shoshana Amos, 64
11) Vitaly Brodsky, 52
12) Nargiza Oststovsky, 54 (wife of Vitaly)
13) Larisa Gomanenko, 48
14) Roman Sokolovsky, 51
15) Eliyahu Ozen, 58


 
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